Wednesday, September 9, 2009


The first alteration to the new motor home was relocating the toilet paper roll in a more convenient place. I'm a bit reluctant to bring up the homely subject of toilet paper again, but, here goes...

I once laughed at the Ann Landers column when she discussed the proper way, according to her readers, to hang the roll. Letters flew in with top vs. bottom rollers. There have been divorces over the correct or incorrect, depending on your point of view, way to hang toilet paper.
Egads! Is there anything more earthshaking going on than toilet paper?

But, here is a sample from my email:

I've just read that seventy-six percent of Americans prefer to have their toilet paper unroll from over the top. Not surprisingly, though, I'm among the elite twenty-four percent who are bottom unrollers.
I've always thought that arm length matters in this case. A person with short arms (like most women) can easily grasp the end of the paper when it is in front and near the top, while a person with longer arms (like me) has to bend his elbow and wrist inconveniently with the paper so placed. On the other hand, having the end of the paper in the back and hanging below allows the longer-armed person to grasp the paper with his arm in a less awkward position.
Aren't you glad you have me to help you with these issues (or tissues, if you prefer)?

And now, I have a confession to make. I've never even told my kids this elucidating information. When I got married, my husband informed me he had to have the toilet paper roll from the bottom. He couldn't stand it any other way. The marriage lasted 40 years, all because of toilet paper.
So, there you have it. I'm a bottom roller and Jim's a top roller. So, whoever changes the roll governs. We gotta keep the peace in the family. And this, I swear, is the last word on the subject.

1 comment:

Tango said...

That's too funny, Mary. I'm a top roller and will turn toilet paper around wherever I go.