Tuesday, November 13, 2012

LEAVE WITH A LAUGH.

I have to turn myself over to the talents of a surgeon and will be absent from this blog for awhile. So, thought I’d leave you with a laugh.

CIGARETTE: A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end and a fool at the other!
MARRIAGE: It’s an agreement wherein a man loses his bachelor’s degree & a woman gains her master’s
LECTURE: An art of transmitting Information from the notes of the lecturer to the notes of students without passing through the minds of either
CONFERENCE: The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present
COMPROMISE: The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece
TEARS: The hydraulic force by which masculine will power is defeated by feminine water-power!
CONFERENCE ROOM: A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody disagrees later on
ECSTASY: A feeling when you feel you are going to feel a feeling you have never felt before
CLASSIC: A book which people praise, but never read SMILE: A curve that can set a lot of things straight!
OFFICE: A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life YAWN: The only time when some married men ever get to open their mouth
EXPERIENCE: The name men give to their Mistakes DIPLOMAT: A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip
OPTIMIST: A person who while falling fromEIFFEL TOWER says in midway “SEE I AM NOT INJURED YET!”
MISER: A person who lives poor so that he can die RICH! FATHER: A banker provided by nature
BOSS: Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early
POLITICIAN: One who shakes your hand before elections and your Confidence Later
DOCTOR: A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you by his bills!

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